Burden of Guilt - part 2
Two weeks had gone by since Mrs. Quinn had left abruptly on the train. Michaela went about her daily routine as if nothing had happened, but Brian and Matthew would often find her sitting in a chair staring into space, unaware of their presence. Whenever Brian or Matthew would try to talk to Michaela about her mother, she would quickly change the subject. Both boys had finally given up on trying to talk to her about it, hoping that when Sully came home he would have better luck.
It was rather late one evening as Michaela sat in front of the living room fire with Katie sound asleep in her lap. Brian and Matthew were sitting on the floor playing a game of checkers when the front door flew open. Startled, everyone looked up and was surprised when Sully entered the room. "Sully!" Brian exclaimed as he quickly jumped up and ran to Sully.
Sully pulled off his coat and then quickly undid his belt, hanging them on the peg beside the door. "Hey, Brian," Sully greeted as he gave him a hug. And then nodding his head at Matthew, he greeted, "Matthew. Didn’t expect to see you here."
"Hi, Sully," returned Matthew as he walked over to Sully and reached out his hand. "I’ve been staying here the last couple of weeks. Just to keep an eye on things," Matthew returned.
"I appreciate that, Matthew," Sully replied as he shook Matthew’s hand. And then turning towards the living room, he quickly walked over to Michaela and kneeling in front of her he said, "Missed ya," and then leaning closer, he seized her lips. But as Sully began to pull away Michaela’s kiss became more ardent and momentarily forgetting the children, she pulled him to her for a long and deep kiss.
Somewhat surprised, Sully once again pulled away, a look of confusion on his face. Realizing that the children were watching, Michaela suddenly blushed and whispered, "I missed you too."
"Yeah, well that’s pretty obvious," Sully snickered and then leaning close, with a twinkle in his eye, he whispered, "We’ll pick this up later." Michaela’s blush deepened and she gently admonished, "Sully!"
Taking a closer look at his wife and noticing the dark circles under her eyes, he suddenly became serious and looking into her eyes he asked, "Is everything alright?"
"Yes, of course, I just missed you is all," Michaela answered somewhat flustered as she quickly lowered her eyes.
Running his hand over Katie’s soft hair, Sully remarked, "She’s up awful late. She alright?"
"Yes, she’s fine Sully. She took a late nap and just wasn’t ready to go to sleep yet," Michaela answered. And then looking down at her daughter’s face, she added, "but it looks like she’s asleep now."
Clearing his throat behind them, Matthew stated, "We weren’t expecting you back for another week, Sully."
"Yeah, I know. But I wanted to get back home as soon as I could and the men I took on the excursion were pretty green and not used to sleeping out in the wild for so long. So we cut the trip short a bit and I rode all day so I could be home tonight."
"Well, we’re sure glad you’re home, Sully. We missed you," Brian stated.
"I’m glad to be home, Brian," Sully replied. And then seeing his daughter sleeping soundly in her mother’s arms, Sully looked at Michaela and whispered, "How ‘bout I put her to bed. I miss doing that when I’m gone." Nodding her head, Sully reached down and gently lifted Katie out of Michaela’s arms. Calling goodnight to his sons over his shoulder, he quietly carried his sleeping daughter up the stairs.
Matthew then turned to Michaela and said, "Why don’t you go ahead and turn in, ma. We’ll make sure the lamps are out and everything is locked up down here."
"Thank you, Matthew. I think I will turn in now. Goodnight," Michaela said as she stood up, stretching her arms as she did so.
"Night, ma," Brian called as she started for the steps.
Michaela stood in the doorway of her daughter’s room watching Sully as he gently tucked Katie into bed. Stooping down, he lightly kissed her blonde hair and gently rubbed her back. "I missed you so much, Kates," Sully whispered and then kissing her once again, he whispered, "I love you."
Turning around Sully found his wife watching him from the doorway. Smiling, he held out his hand and Michaela quickly walked towards him, placing her hand in his. Wrapping his arms around her waist, Sully whispered in her ear, "I miss her so much when I’m away. It seems like she’s grown at least an inch."
"She misses you, too," Michaela softly replied, "but not as much as her mama does," she added sheepishly.
Sully looked down at his wife’s flushed face and kissed her soft lips. Taking her hand in his, he led her into their bedroom, softly closing the door behind them. Sully walked over to the wash basin while Michaela got into her nightgown. Walking over to her night table, she sat down and began to brush her hair. It wasn’t long before Sully came up from behind and taking the brush out of her hand, he began to brush her long, silky hair.
"Did you know that this is one of the things I miss most when I’m away, brushing your hair like this," Sully spoke softly.
Michaela looked at him in the mirror and with a shy smile she answered, "Did you know it’s one of the things I miss most when you’re away."
Leaning down, he softly kissed the top of her head. Meeting her eyes in the mirror, Sully asked, "So how was everything here while I was away. Anything happen?"
Standing up and turning to face Sully, Michaela put her arms around his neck and whispered provocatively, "Can we talk in the morning?"
With a gleam in his eye, Sully pulled back and said, "Sure, I understand you’re tired. Maybe we should get to bed now."
Her eyes bubbling with mischief, Michaela whispered, "Oh, we definitely should get to bed now. But who said anything about being tired?" Michaela’s hands slowly began to move in circles on Sully’s chest as his hands tightened around her waist.
Sully's eyes were twinkling and looking into Michaela's burning eyes, his sultry voice whispered, "See, you went and wasted all that energy for nothing, when you could’ve saved it for me?"
"What energy?" Michaela asked in a low and sultry voice as her hands wandered lower to his hips.
Sully's hand slid off of Michaela's waist and slowly down to her thighs. Grabbing her nightgown, he slowly eased it up over her waist and then quickly pulled it over her head. "All the energy it took you to put this on," he whispered into her ear as he flung her nightgown across the room. Michaela was responding to his every touch and their desire for each other was evident. Suddenly he lifted Michaela off of the floor and slowly walked the short distance to their bed, gently laying her in the center.
Michaela reached up and pulled his head down for a kiss. The kiss was slow and passionate as Sully's hand continued to caress Michaela's soft and silky skin. Pulling away, Sully quickly stood up and removed his buckskins and then took his place beside his wife. Michaela gazed into her husband's blazing eyes and with a slight grin, she whispered, "And you needn’t worry, I still have plenty of energy left for you." Smiling wickedly, he turned to face his beloved and gently pulled her close, seizing her moist lips. As their bodies became entwined, their senses were newly awakened. Each gentle caress sent shivers throughout their bodies and soon they were both brought to the exhausted state of bliss, collapsing into each other's arms.
"I love you," Sully gasped as he tried to catch his breath, his lips close to her ear. "Me too," Michaela softly replied. Soon their breathing slowed and their heartbeats returned to normal. They were both silent for a long time, content to lie quietly in each other’s arms. Suddenly Sully pulled Michaela close against his chest and whispered teasingly, "What would your mother think of you now, the proper Boston-bred lady you are?"
While her thoughts had momentarily been on her mother's visit, she was caught off guard by Sully's innocent comment. Michaela instantly tensed but quickly catching herself, she realized that Sully was only teasing. "Mother could never possibly understand," Michaela answered wistfully and then with a barely perceivable sigh, Michaela snuggled closer to Sully. "I'm really glad you're home," Michaela softly whispered between yawns, "I missed you. Goodnight."
Sully felt Michaela's body tense for just an instant but quickly dismissed it. Burying his head into Michaela's hair, he squeezed her lightly and kissed her temple. "No other place I wanna be," he whispered back, "I love you." Safe and secure in each other's arms, they slowly drifted off into a blissful sleep.
Michaela had been in the middle of a pleasant dream when suddenly her eyes popped open. She wasn't sure what had awoken her, but as she slowly looked around the room, she realized that it was still in the middle of the night. She reached over to touch the empty space beside her when her hand encountered her husband's chest. And then suddenly she remembered that Sully was home. A big smile came to her lips as she remembered their lovemaking last night. And then suddenly she knew what had awoken her as she listened to her stomach growl loudly.
Carefully slipping out of bed so as not to disturb Sully, Michaela frantically looked for her nightgown, but to no avail. Picking up her robe instead, she slipped it on and then found her slippers under the bed. Quietly opening the door, she walked downstairs to get something to eat. After fixing a sandwich and a glass of milk, Michaela walked into the living room and draping a quilt loosely over her legs she sat down in one of the wingback chairs. Picking up her sandwich, she began to eat as her eyes stared blankly ahead. Once again she became lost in thought as her mind continually replayed her mother's sudden but brief visit.
"What's the matter, can't sleep?" Michaela was startled out of her reverie and slightly jumped as a hand gently rested on her leg. "Sully!" she cried softly. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare ya," Sully whispered. "Can't sleep?"
Michaela smiled at him and then in a soft voice she said, "My stomach woke me up. I guess I didn't realize just how hungry I was. But now that you’re home my appetite seems to be back."
Sully reached up to caress her face and gazed into her beautiful eyes. "So you haven't been eating while I was gone?" he asked, his voice etched with a tint of worry.
"I'm fine Sully...and speaking of which, I bet it's been awhile since you've had anything to eat," Michaela replied, quickly changing the subject. "Here, Sully, I really can't eat the other half of this sandwich," she said as she handed him the plate. Sully was pretty hungry and the sandwich sure did look good, so it didn't take much coaxing for him to take the plate. Turning around to sit on the floor between Michaela's legs, Sully dug into the sandwich.
As Michaela's eyes roamed aimlessly around the room, she once again became lost in thought. Sully finished his sandwich and then set the plate down on the floor. Turning his head he watched as Michaela eyes flittered unseeingly around the room. Turning around so he was again facing her, Sully gently lifted one of Michaela's hand and softly whispered, "Something bothering ya, Michaela?"
Michaela's eyes flew to Sully's and shaking herself mentally, she quickly replied, "No, everything's fine Sully, really." Sully held her hands tightly in his and looking into her eyes, he asked softly, "What were you thinking about?"
For an instant Michaela's mind went blank but she knew she had to say something. Suddenly her lips turned up and she felt her cheeks turn red. "What?" Sully asked curiously.
"Well, I was just thinking about one night while you were gone. I was really missing you so I wore one of your shirts to bed and I had the most pleasant dream about you," she blushed. "Somehow you felt closer to me."
"Well, I dreamt about you many a nights, but I think I would have looked pretty silly sleeping in one of your blouses. I think I would have given everyone something to talk about, huh," Sully laughed. He laid Michaela's hands back down onto her lap and held them there with one hand. His other hand found its way under her blanket and slowly his hand crept up her leg.
Michaela smiled and slowly she began to run her fingers through Sully's hair. Sully looked into Michaela's eyes and saw the desire he was hoping for. He leaned in and gently cupped her face in his hand. Slowly his mouth came down over hers as his tongue parted her lips. Breathless, Sully pulled back and with a wicked smile, he slowly unbuttoned her robe to reveal her soft white flesh.
Michaela's heart was beginning to pound rapidly. "Sully," she gasped as his lips lightly teased her nipple. "We only did this hours ago, remember?" Her skin was on fire from his touch.
"Uh, I think I forgot. Maybe you'd better refresh my memory," Sully breathed heavily as his hands moved lower and lower.
"Maybe I'd better," she softly moaned and in one swift motion they both slid to the floor and for the next hour they both delighted in giving and receiving the pleasures that marriage affords.
It was the second morning after Sully's return. The sun had just risen over the mountaintops, casting a soft pinkish glow into the open window. The air was warm and the breeze was still, but for this time of year it was to be expected. Sully had thrown the covers off sometime ago and to his surprise, Michaela had not objected. He lay there now, watching her as she sleep, her chest rising ever so slightly. His skin tingled as he thought of her and reaching out he lightly ran his fingers across her lips. Michaela stirred slightly but her eyes remained closed. Sully was trying to decide on whether to wake her or not when suddenly he heard the soft pitter-patter of little feet on the wooden floor. Leaning over he lightly kissed Michaela on the cheek and then quickly rose out of bed and pulled on his buckskins.
"'Morning, Kates," Sully whispered as he opened their bedroom door to find Katie standing outside. Leaning down he lifted her into his arms. "Mama," Katie whimpered as she rested her cheek against her pa's chest. "Sshhh, Kates. Let's let mama sleep some more. She got home real late last night."
"Mama doctor, help patience," Katie proudly pronounced.
"Yeah, that's right. Mama was helping a patient last night and she got home real late. So how about I get you changed and I'll fix you something to eat?" Sully asked his smiling daughter.
"Pancakes!" Katie squealed with delight. "I help papa make pancakes."
"Sure, that sounds easy enough. We don't need mama for that now, do we?" Sully laughed as he carried Katie back to her room. After Katie was changed and dressed for the new day, Sully picked her up and started out her door. Suddenly Katie tugged on Sully's arm and pointed to her music box on the dresser. "Ring," Katie cried. "Granma ring," she cried louder.
"What it is Katie, what do you want," Sully asked as he walked her over to the dresser and lifted up the lid to Katie's music box. As he lifted up the box a lovely tune began to play but Katie ignored that and continued to point to the box. Lifting up the box so Katie could see the contents, Sully asked, "Now what do you want with your music box, Katie?"
Katie lifted a small ring from the center of the box and held it up for Sully to see. "Granma give me," Katie announced proudly. Sully took the ring from Katie and slid it on her tiny finger. "Did grandma send you a present?" Sully asked her. Shaking her head violently, Katie answered, "No, Granma give me ring."
"Yes, well, it's a very pretty ring but you have to take special care of it. Does mama want you to wear it?" Sully questioned the small child, wondering if there was a reason why it was still in the music box and not on Katie's finger.
"Mama let me sometimes, if I be careful," she answered determinedly. "I be careful, papa," she added, her eyelashes lowering ever so slowly. That melted Sully and he immediately gave in. "Alright, you can wear it, but just in the house, and just this morning. You and those eyes, just like your ma," Sully teased her as he twitched her nose. Giving her a wet kiss, he carried her down the stairs to start breakfast for the family.
Michaela had been exhausted when she came home last night. After quickly changing she had collapsed into bed and before she knew it she had fallen asleep. By the time Sully had come upstairs, Michaela was fast asleep and he hadn't had the heart to wake her. Since she had been out so late last night Sully had decided to let Michaela sleep in. He figured she could go into the clinic a little later, the townspeople would understand.
During breakfast that morning Brian told the family about his latest school project while Matthew talked about a recent law case he was studying. Michaela seemed to be unusually quiet but Sully just attributed that to still being tired. He had noticed since his return that at times she would seem somewhat distracted, but since they really hadn't had a lot of time together, he had easily dismissed it as his imagination or him just worrying about her too much. Suddenly Katie held up her hand and loudly announced, "I wear Granma ring," she said proudly, to no one in particular, as she swung her hand high above her head.
"Yes, Kates, we know it's the ring Grandma sent you," Sully replied as he laughed at his daughter's excitement. And then turning to Michaela, he innocently asked, "So what did your mother have to say in her letter?"
Without thinking Brian spoke, "Oh, Grandma didn’t write a letter. She gave it to Katie when she was here." Suddenly Matthew gave Brian a swift kick under the table. "Ouch," Brian yelled. "What was that for?"
Realizing what he had said, Brian looked at Matthew and then to Michaela. "Sorry," he whispered as he shrugged his shoulders.
Sully had noticed the swift kick Matthew gave Brian and looking from one son to the other, he asked somewhat surprised, "Your Grandma was here?"
Matthew glanced at his mother and then looking at Sully he said, "Yeah, she arrived not long after you left."
Sully looked at Michaela but she quickly averted his eyes and nervously began playing with the food on her plate. Suddenly Michaela arose from the table and picking up her uneaten plate of food, she walked over to the kitchen and began to clear her plate. Sully watched in confusion as Michaela stood up and walked away from the table. Looking again at Matthew, he asked, "How long was she here?"
Matthew glanced at Michaela who now had her back to her family. Turning back to Sully, Matthew spoke in a low voice. "She left almost as soon as she got here." Seeing the puzzled look on Sully’s face, Matthew explained, "She came in on a Wednesday evening and then she left Friday morning."
Sully was really confused now. He couldn’t understand why his mother-in-law would travel all that distance and then only stay for a day. And he also didn’t understand why Michaela had not said anything to him about her visit. He was about to ask why she had come when suddenly Michaela walked over to the table and lifting Katie out of her highchair, she said, "Come on, Katie. Let’s go upstairs and get ready to go into town." Still avoiding Sully’s gaze, she quickly whisked Katie out of the room and walked up the stairs.
Sully watched as his wife walked hurriedly out of the room. Then turning to his sons, he asked with concern, "What’s going on?"
"Grandma and ma had a fight," Brian quickly spoke up. "A fight?" Sully asked, "what do you mean by a fight?"
"We’re not really sure what happened, Sully, but they definitely had some kind of argument. When we came home the next day, Grandma and ma were barely speaking to each other. Ma wouldn’t even come down for supper that night. Said she had a headache. I’ve tried talking to her, we both did, but each time she said she didn’t want to talk about it. We were hoping you might have a little better luck," Matthew replied wishfully.
"And you have no idea what they argued about," queried Sully. "Your Grandma didn’t say anything?"
"No, nothin’," Matthew replied. "The only thing she said was that she wouldn’t stay where she’s not welcome."
"I thought ma would try to stop her when she told us she was leaving that morning, but she just let her walk out," Brian added.
"When we took her to the train station Friday morning we tried to get her to stay but she said this was for the best," Matthew continued. "And then she told us to make sure that ma eats and that she still loves her."
"I thought she seemed somewhat distracted since I got back, but I just dismissed it as me worrying about her too much," Sully spoke to the boys. "I am kinda surprised that she never mentioned it though. I think I’ll go up and talk to her."
Sully wiped his mouth with a napkin and then standing up he asked, "Could you hitch up the wagon for me, Matthew?"
"Sure, Sully," Matthew replied. "Come on, Brian, you can clear the table while I hitch up the wagon."
"How come I gotta clear the table?" Brian bickered. "I’ll hitch up the wagon and you clear the table."
Sully stopped a moment and then turning to Brian he said, "Brian, please, just clear the table for me."
Brian looked up at Sully sheepishly and then in a low voice he said, "Sorry, Sully. I’ll do the dishes."
"Thanks, Brian. I appreciate it." And then Sully turned to walk up the steps.
When Sully entered their bedroom he found Katie jumping on the bed and Michaela sitting at her night table trying to pin up her hair. As he entered the room Michaela’s eyes momentarily met his in the mirror, but quickly she lowered her head. Sully walked over to the bed and sitting Katie down, he gently said, "Katie, we’re not allowed to jump on the bed. Can you sit for a minute while I talk to your mama?"
"Sorry, papa,?" Katie’s little eyes pleaded. "I good for papa."
"I know you’re a good girl," Sully grinned as he kissed her cheek. "Would you like to play with my beads?" he asked as he lifted them off of his neck.
Katie’s eyes lit up. "Papa beads," she squealed.
Turning around Sully walked the few steps over to his wife. Placing his hands on her shoulders, Sully gently asked, "Why didn’t you tell me your mother was here?"
In exasperation Michaela finally gave up with her hair and proceeded to quickly braid it. Without looking up Michaela slightly shrugged her shoulders and replied, "It just slipped my mind is all."
"It slipped your mind?" Sully asked in disbelief. Sully slowly turned Michaela around so that she was now facing him. Gently lifting her chin, he looked into her eyes and softly asked, "Michaela, did something happen between you and your ma?"
"I don’t want to talk about it," Michaela answered and then quickly scooted out from under Sully’s arms. "We’d better hurry or Brian will be late for school," she continued as she hurriedly walked out the room, leaving Sully to tend to Katie.
Sully watched in wonder as Michaela exited their room. Going to the bed he lifted Katie into his arms. "Well, I guess that didn’t go so well, did it Kates? Do you know what’s wrong with mama?" he asked, knowing that the child had no idea what her papa was talking about. "Come on, sweet girl, let’s get downstairs before your ma decides to leave without us."
The wagon ride into town seemed unusually long for Michaela. She sat up front with Sully while Brian held Katie in the back and Matthew rode along side of them on his horse. Although Brian and Sully chatted back and forth with Matthew, Michaela remained pensive and quiet. She was so deep in thought that she hadn’t even noticed that they had arrived in town.
Michaela was quickly brought out of her reverie when she felt a hand on her shoulder. "Ma," Brian was calling. Startled, she turned around to face her youngest son and answered, "Yes, Brian?"
"Ma, we’re here, at school. Are you gonna take Katie?" Brian asked, watching his ma with concern.
"Oh, yes, of course," Michaela quickly answered as she finally noticed her surroundings. "Have a nice day," she said as she lifted Katie onto her lap.
"I will. Goodbye ma, bye Sully. See ya after school," Brian returned and then quickly ran to join his friends.
Sully laid his hand on Michaela’s knee and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Are you alright?" he asked softly as he looked at his wife. Glancing at Sully she nodded her head and then gave him a slight smile and then quickly diverted her attention to Katie. Sully snapped the reigns and then they all headed towards the clinic.
Sully pulled up in front of the clinic, set the brake and jumped out. Reaching up he took Katie from Michaela and then with one hand he helped her down. Putting Katie down on the ground, he looked at his wife and said, "I’m gonna help Robert E this morning and then I’ll watch Katie for you this afternoon. How about I meet you for lunch, say about noon"
"Yes, that sounds fine, Sully," Michaela replied. "I’ll see you at lunch then." Michaela reached down and grabbed Katie’s hand and then turned to Sully to give him a kiss. "Have a good day," Sully returned and then looking at Katie he stooped down and gave her a kiss also and said to her, "You be good for your mama my sweet girl." As Sully hopped back up into the wagon, Michaela and Katie entered the clinic.
It was almost noon when Sully arrived at the clinic to take Michaela and Katie to lunch. The morning had been extremely busy for Michaela and Katie was becoming very impatient at being ignored by her mother. Michaela was stitching up a patient’s hand and at the moment she just couldn’t pick her daughter up. When Sully walked in Katie was sitting in the play area, fresh tears on her cheeks. "Thank goodness you’re here," Michaela sighed in exasperation. And then looking at her patient, she apologized. "I’m terribly sorry, Mr. Watkins. She really usually isn’t this fussy."
Sully walked over to the play area and picked Katie up and then sat down at Michaela’s desk with Katie in his lap. "What’s the matter, Kates? You don’t look very happy," Sully asked her as he gently rubbed her back. "Mama not play," Katie cried between hiccups as she laid her head against her pa’s chest. .
Mr. Watkins watched as Sully lifted his small daughter out of the play area and she immediately ceased her crying. "That’s alright Dr. Mike. Ya remember I got five youngins’ at home," Mr. Watkins replied. "She just needed some special attention from her pa."
Sully watched as Michaela finished the final stitches to Mr. Watkins’ hand. "Hey Ed, looks like a pretty nasty cut there."
"Nah, it ain’t too bad. The Doc here fixed me up real good. Say’s there will barely be a scar, not that one more would matter much to me," Mr. Watkins joked.
"Yeah, I know what you mean," Sully answered as he held up an arm showing a visible scar. And then smiling up at Michaela, he said, "But you’re right about one thing, you’re definitely in good hands."
As she finished tying off Mr. Watkins’ bandage, Michaela returned Sully’s smile and then said, "If you two are done showing off your war scars, then I think we’re finished here."
Mr. Watkins gently pulled down the sleeve to his shirt. After hopping off of the examination table, he reached into his pocket and pulled out some coins. "Will this cover it, Dr. Mike?" he asked as he buttoned his sleeve.
Walking Mr. Watkins to the door, Michaela took the coins and said, "Yes, thank you, Ed. And tell Mabel and the children hello for us."
As the door closed behind him, Michaela leaned back against it and closing her eyes, she let out a heavy sigh. "What a day," she said, "and it’s only half over. I hope this afternoon isn’t like this." There had been a steady flow of patients all morning and she had barely taken the time to breathe. Walking over to Katie, she reached out her arms and Katie quickly went to her. "I’m sorry sweetheart," Michaela whispered as she patted her daughter’s back, "I know it’s been a rough day for you too."
Sully stood up and putting his arms around Michaela and Katie he asked, "So, are you two hungry?"
Katie looked up at her papa with her big brown eyes and shook her head, "I starved papa." Smiling, Michaela kissed the top of her daughter’s head and looking at Sully, she answered, "I’m famished also. I didn’t realize just how hungry I was until now."
With his arms still tightly around them, he looked down into Michaela’s green and brown eyes. "Well you didn’t eat much this morning," Sully whispered. Michaela quickly lowered her eyes and noticing her discomfort, Sully asked, "Are you ready?" "Yes, let’s go," Michaela answered as she shifted Katie to her other hip.
Grace walked over to the table carrying a large tray of food. As she set a plate down in front of Michaela she commented, "Well, it looks like you got your appetite back, Dr. Mike. I was beginning to worry about ya." And then placing a plate in front of Sully, she added, "We’re sure glad you’re back Sully." After giving Katie a pat on the head, she left to wait on another customer.
Sully watched as Michaela’s face turned red from embarrassment. Michaela could feel Sully’s eyes on her as he watched her every move. "I wish everyone would quit being so concerned about my eating habits," she commented offensively. Sully placed his hand on top of hers and said softly, "That’s only because everyone cares about ya, Michaela."
Feigning a smile, Michaela spoke quietly, "Yes, I know," and then picking up her fork Michaela said cheerfully, "Grace surely outdid herself today." Michaela kept her eyes on her plate as she pretended to concentrate on her food. Sully picked up Katie’s cup and lifted it to her mouth. "Katie, drink some of your milk for papa." He again turned his attention to Michaela and after swallowing his bite of food, he asked nonchalantly, "So what did your ma have to say when she was here?"
"Katie, you have to eat your vegetables," Michaela said as she ignored Sully’s question and turned her full attention to Katie. Picking up her biscuit, she broke it in two and gave Katie the other half. "If you want to grow up to be a big girl like your sister Colleen, you have to eat your vegetables."
Sully continued to watch Michaela as she tried to get Katie to eat. "I don’t think she’s very hungry, Michaela. I think she’s getting tired."
"You’re probably right. She usually takes a short nap in the morning but she would have none of it today," Michaela answered back. Looking at Katie again, Michaela pleaded, "Katie, if you eat just a few bites, mama will let you have a piece of cake." That seemed to get Katie’s attention because her eyes lit up and she squealed, "Choclate!"
Michaela and Sully looked at their daughter and laughed. "Yes, I’m sure Miss Grace has chocolate cake just for you, Kates," Sully laughed. "But you have to eat some of your vegetables first, like mama asked."
Katie nodded her head vigorously and opened her mouth as her papa lifted a spoonful of peas to her mouth. After her first bite, Katie stated matter-of-factly, her soft brown eyes melting Sully. "I done papa. Eat cake." Sully looked at Michaela and shrugged his shoulders. "Alright, Katie, you can have a piece of cake now." Seeing Grace, Sully called her over to the table and asked for a piece of chocolate cake for Katie.
As they were waiting for Grace to bring Katie her piece of cake, Sully decided to try to talk to Michaela again about her mother. "Michaela?" Sully asked softly. "Hmmm," she answered in return as she finished off her potatoes. "So why was your ma here?" Michaela looked up at Sully but was quickly relieved when Grace appeared at the table with Katie’s piece of cake. "Thank you Grace," Sully said as Katie began clapping her hands. "That’s an awfully big piece of cake for such a sweet little girl."
Grace looked at Katie and smiling she said, "Well, I thought she might like to share with her ma and pa."
"I share," Katie stated as she swiped her finger through the icing and held it out to Sully. Leaning over, Sully licked the icing off of Katie’s finger. "How ‘bout some for your mama, Katie?" Sully asked. "Just a little bite," Michaela replied as she leaned towards Katie for her piece. Sully and Michaela sat in silence and watched as Katie dug her hands into her piece of cake. After a few moments Sully reached across and lifted Michaela’s hand in his. "Michaela...," Sully started.
Michaela looked into Sully’s eyes and immediately knew what he was about to ask. "Sully, please," Michaela pleaded softly before quickly lowering her eyes, and then turning away she once again focused her attention on Katie. "Katie, I think you have more on your mouth than in it."
Sully squeezed her hand tighter and taking a deep breath, he continued, "Michaela, you can’t keep changing the subject on me. Are you gonna tell me what happened between you and your ma?"
Pulling her hand away quickly, she looked at Sully and shouted, "I said I didn’t want to talk about it." Her voice came across loud and harsh and several heads turned in their direction. Taken aback by her sudden outburst, Sully leaned back in his chair and eyed his wife closely.
"I’m sorry, Sully," Michaela softly repented, her eyes now moist with tears. "I shouldn’t have raised my voice like that."
Knowing now was not the time to pursue this, he reached out again and lightly squeezed her arm. "That’s alright," he whispered and then turning to Katie, he said, "I think you’re done now, Katie. How ‘bout you and papa go for a walk this afternoon?"
Feeling ashamed at her outburst, Michaela smiled at Sully and said, "You don’t have to watch her this afternoon. She really needs a nap and I only have one scheduled patient this afternoon."
Sully gazed into Michaela’s moist eyes and whispered, "It seems like both of my girls could use a nap, huh?"
"Yes, I suppose that may be true, but this one will have to manage without one today. I have too much work to do at the clinic," Michaela answered timidly.
After washing Katie’s hands and face, Sully pushed his chair back and stood up from the table. As he lifted Katie out of the highchair he said, "Well, this one here definitely is ready for a nap. How ‘bout I put her to sleep for ya and then I’ll come back later and take her for a walk?"
"Thank you," Michaela answered as she too stood up from the table. "I owe you one."
Sully reached into his pocket and pulled out a few coins, laying them on the table. With Katie in one arm, he put his other one over Michaela’s shoulder and leaning close to her he whispered teasingly into her ear, "I’ll hold you to that." Michaela looked up at Sully and saw the twinkle in his eyes. Flashing that smile that Sully loves so well, she whispered in return, "I love you," and then leaned in for a kiss, to which Sully gladly reciprocated.
Back at the clinic Sully had just gotten Katie down for a nap. As he entered the main room he found Michaela sitting at her desk going over a patient file. Walking up behind her, he put his arms around her shoulders and leaning down he kissed her neck and then whispered, "Are you sure you can’t take that little nap right now?" His voice was low and husky and his hands were moving sensually up and down her arms.
His movements were beginning to arouse Michaela’s senses and she leaned her head back to look up into Sully’s eyes. "There’s nothing I’d like better right now, Sully, but I have a patient coming in about 20 minutes," Michaela answered just as Sully’s lips came down over hers. Michaela could feel her heartbeat quicken and they were both breathless as Sully pulled away from their kiss.
"We’ll make it quick," Sully breathed heavily as he moved his hands lightly across her breasts, causing Michaela’s skin to tingle. She was slowly losing her grasp on reality as she began to surrender to her husband’s sensual caresses. Grabbing Sully’s hand, she slowly stood up and turned to face him as he again seized her lips with his. "I can’t believe I’m letting you do this," she gasped as Sully’s wet lips grazed her neck. "Mrs. Galloway could be here at any time."
Nodding his head toward the door that led upstairs, Sully pulled her slowly away from the desk. "Come on then, we best not waste any time," he whispered, his breath hot on her neck. "I’ll lock the doors," Michaela whispered back, her face flushed with desire. With Michaela’s hand still clutched tightly in his, they walked to the door and locked it. As they started up the steps they suddenly heard a loud knock. "Mrs. Galloway," sighed a flustered Michaela. "She’s early." Looking up at Sully, she began to apologize. "I’m sorry Sully. She has a bad foot. I can’t keep her waiting."
"I know, I know, it’s alright," Sully replied in exasperation as he backed Michaela up against the stairwell wall, his fingers entwined in her hair. Caressing his body tightly against hers, he snickered, "That’s not the only thing she has that’s bad." Michaela looked up at him, her eyes questioning. "Tell her she has bad timing also," he teased as he gave her one last long and probing kiss. When he finally pulled away, he gazed deep into her eyes and whispered, "I think maybe I’ll go take that walk now; work off some of this energy."
As the knocking became more persistent, Michaela reached up to straighten her hair and then quickly smoothed her clothes. Walking over to the door Michaela took a deep, composing breath and was about to turn the doorknob when Sully’s hand suddenly stopped her. Leaning down he whispered provocatively, "I’ll expect payment in full tonight," and before she could respond he quickly opened the door. "Mrs. Galloway," Michaela greeted with a smile, "Please come in."
"Hello, Dr. Mike. I know I’m early. I hope I didn’t come at a bad time," she said as she noticed Michaela’s flushed cheeks and her husband standing behind her, grinning from ear to ear.
"No.. no, of course not," Michaela stammered. "We were just putting our daughter down for a nap. Please, come in." As Mrs. Galloway entered the clinic she greeted Sully also. "Sully, it’s good to see you again."
"Mrs. Galloway," Sully returned the greeting, "nice seein’ ya again. Those kids keeping you busy?" "They most certainly are," she replied. "That’s how I got this bad ankle, chasing after one of my youngins." Turning to Michaela once again, Sully gave her a slight wink and kissing her on the cheek he said, "I’ll come back later when Katie wakes up and take her on that walk I promised."
At home that evening Michaela appeared to be her usual self. Not wanting to eat alone, Matthew had made it a habit to come for dinner each night, to the delight of both parents. Seated around the dinner table that night their conversation had been lively and upbeat. No further mention had been made of their conversation at lunch and for the moment Sully was content to keep it that way. As Michaela stood up and began to clear the table, Brian picked up his plate and said, "I’ll help ya with the dishes, ma."
As Brian and Michaela did the dishes, Sully and Matthew occupied Katie on the front porch. It was too warm for a fire and with the stove on for cooking, the house was quite warm inside. Sully sat on the top step whittling while Matthew sat on the step beside him brushing Wolf. Katie was sitting on the porch behind them, busy playing with her doll "I wanna thank you Matthew for taking care of the family while I was gone," Sully spoke sincerely.
"It’s no problem, Sully. Glad I could do it," Matthew answered. After hesitating a moment, Matthew looked at Sully and asked, "So, did you find out what when on between Dr. Mike and her ma?"
"No, I didn’t. I got the same answer as you did. She doesn’t want to talk about it. In fact, she became very agitated at lunch today when I brought it up," Sully replied. "Whatever it is has gotten her quite upset, though she’s trying not to show it."
"I don’t get it Sully. I thought that after everything you two have been through this past year that she would have been more open to you. What do you think it was that got her so upset that she won’t even talk to you about it?" Matthew asked perplexed.
"I’ve been asking myself that same question, Matthew, but I’m at a loss as much as you are. I ain’t givin’ up though. I thought maybe I’d try talkin’ to her again tonight," Sully replied.
"It’s not like Dr. Mike to keep secrets from you," Matthew observed.
"No, it ain’t Matthew," Sully answered. "But look at me. I’ve had my own little secrets that I didn’t tell anyone about. I suppose, maybe to some degree, that everyone does. And look how your ma found out about mine. First, when I deserted the army and then just recently with Josh."
"Yeah, but that was because you felt ashamed about killing that man and then about being with Sheryl that night, even though you thought it was Abigail," Matthew stated. "But I can’t see Dr. Mike ever killing anyone and we know that David was her only beau before coming out here and meeting you."
Sully chuckled lightly and Matthew looked at him with questioning eyes. "What’s so funny?" Matthew queried as he laid down the brush, patting Wolf on the back. .
"I was just thinking ‘bout what you just said," Sully grinned. "And you’re right, I can’t see it being anything like my secrets. Your ma was so scared just to be alone with me ‘fore we were married that I hardly think it could be about another man. And your ma could never take anyone’s life. I know that without a doubt."
"Well, she’s certainly not afraid anymore," Matthew smiled. "You were the best thing that ever happened to ma. I hope someday that I can find someone and be as happy as you two are," Matthew said wistfully, his eyes looking far into the distance.
Sully noticed the sullen look in Matthew’s eyes and his heart went out to him. Placing his hand on his arm, he replied, "It will happen, Matthew. When you’re least expecting it, someone will come along and you’ll find love again. After all, look how old your ma and me were when we met."
Just then Sully felt a small hand on his arm as Katie stood behind him. Reaching out to her he pulled her onto his lap. "What’s the matter, Kates. You getting sleepy?" Sully asked.
"No!" Katie yawned, "I not seepy." Clutching her doll in one hand she leaned her head against Sully’s chest and immediately her other hand found its way into her mouth. Reaching over to lightly pat her back, Matthew looked at his little sister and pointing to her thumb in her mouth he asked, "Can I have some of that Katie?" "No, mine," Katie cried as she struggled to keep her eyes open.
They continued to sit for awhile in silence and it wasn’t long before Katie was fast asleep. Just then Michaela appeared on the front porch with two glasses of lemonade. Bending over, she handed one glass to Matthew and then setting the other glass on the porch beside Sully, she reached for her daughter. "I’ll put her to bed now Sully and then I’ll come down and join you."
Handing Katie up to his wife, Sully asked, "Where’s Brian?"
"He said he had some writing to do so he was going up to his room," answered Michaela as she shifted Katie in her arms. "Are you going to be staying the night, Matthew?"
"Nah, I don’t think so. I’ll be leaving in just a short while," he answered in return.
"All right then. I’ll see you tomorrow and please be careful Matthew," Michaela stated worriedly.
Matthew laughed softly and looking up at Michaela, he chuckled, "You don’t have to worry about me, Dr. Mike. I’m a grown man now and I can take care of myself."
Michaela smiled down at her oldest son and laying a hand on his shoulder she gave him a slight squeeze. "I know, but I can’t help but worry about all of my children, even the ones that are grown."
Matthew laid his hand on top of Michaela and patting it, he replied lovingly, "Goodnite, ma. I love you." "Goodnight, Matthew," Michaela answered and then flashing Sully a smile, she walked inside to put Katie to bed.
"Sure is a hot one tonight," Matthew commented as he wiped the sweat from his brow. "Haven’t seen it this hot in a long time."
"Nope, don’t think it has been. In fact, I reckon it hasn’t been this hot since we had that drought some years back," Sully stated.
"Yeah, I remember. It was right after we came back from Boston, when you and Dr. Mike finally admitted that you loved each other." After a long pause, Matthew continued. "Remember when we tried to teach you to dance when you thought ma was in love with Dr. Burke."
"How could I ever forget," Sully reminisced. "I thought for sure your ma was gonna stay in Boston. I remember Mrs. Quinn coming to my room one night and bringing me those fancy clothes. Boy did I ever get the looks from her when I showed up that night."
Suddenly a thought occurred to Matthew. "Sully, I was just thinking and I know maybe this ain’t it...."
"What is it Matthew?" Sully asked as he noticed Matthew’s hesitation.
"Well, I was just thinking that maybe ma and grandma argued about you," Matthew gently stated. Seeing the puzzled look on Sully’s face, he continued. "I remember now the night Grandma came, she mentioned something about how you always were gone when she was here, that you were always deserting the family. Maybe she said something about you that upset ma."
Sully pondered this for a moment and then said, "I suppose that could be it. I know Mrs. Quinn has never been real fond of me and I know I ain’t exactly the man she would choose to marry her daughter, but I thought, at least I had hoped, that she had started to warm up to me, at least maybe just a little."
"I thought she had too," stated Matthew. "At least the last time she was here she seemed to have accepted you. She even made a comment on how happy ma looked when you snuck into the house for Thanksgiving dinner. But maybe that’s not it; it was just a thought."
"Well, like I said earlier, I ain’t givin’ up. I’ll try to talk to her again tonight," Sully stated hopefully. His thoughts suddenly turned to this afternoon, in the clinic. His wife had been very playful with him until they had been interrupted. A slight smile turned the corner of his lips. "I’ll talk to her tonight," he thought to himself, "but after she makes good on her promise."
Standing, Matthew set the empty glass down on the porch and extending his hand, Sully took it. "I best be going now. It’s getting late and I want to get an early start tomorrow. I’ll see you all tomorrow Sully."
"Alright, goodnight Matthew," Sully stood as Matthew walked down the few steps to his horse. After climbing on, he turned to Sully and tipped his hat.
Sully sat back down on the porch step, waiting for his wife to come back down. With it being so hot and humid tonight, Sully took off his shirt and threw it over the railing. Leaning his head against the rail he closed his eyes and listened to the distant sounds of the night. In the distance he heard the hoot of an owl and the faint cry of a coyote.
"Penny for your thoughts," Michaela softly asked. Opening his eyes, he reached out his hand as Michaela sat on the step beside him. "Kids asleep?" Sully asked as he put his arms around her shoulder, pulling her closer to him. "Yes. Katie woke up and I thought I’d never get her back to sleep. It’s just so hot and sticky out, it’s even hard to sleep."
Sully reached up and wiped Michaela’s forehead and then leaning in close, he gave her a kiss. "Brian seemed awfully tired tonight?" Sully commented. "Yes, he was," Michaela answered. "Since it was their last day of school he and some of the other kids got up a game of baseball. I believe he was worn out, and this heat doesn’t help at all."
After looking up at the sky, Michaela turned to Sully and asked, "Do you think it will rain tonight? We sure could use it."
Looking up, Sully studied the sky for a moment and then answered, "Nah, I don’t think so, not tonight anyway." With his arm still around his wife, he leaned over and whispered in her ear. "Did I ever tell you how much I love you?"
"Not in the last hour?" she teased, leaning over to give him a kiss. Her eyes roamed over her husband's bare chest and pointing to the step below, she said softly, "Come here and sit and I'll give you a massage." Sully smiled at her and quickly took his place on the step below her. Michaela began massaging her husband's neck, working her fingers gently but firmly over his tense muscles. As Sully began to relax her hands moved lower to his shoulders. Closing his eyes he sighed in content as his whole body began to relax under her gentle massages.
Michaela leaned over and kissed the back of his neck, and she felt Sully shiver. Her hands suddenly became more sensual as they moved in circles on his chest, lightly caressing his nipples. Sully turned to look at his wife and her eyes were ablaze with fire. Looking deep into her soul, Sully cupped her chin in his hand and whispered, "I love you, Michaela."
The kiss was at first gentle, but soon their passion was ignited and the kiss became more ardent. When they finally broke apart, they were both covered with a fine sheen of sweat and their hearts were beating rapidly in unison. "It's so hot," Michaela whispered hoarsely as she again wiped the sweat from her brow.
Sully raised his hands to the buttons on Michaela's blouse and whispered, "That's because you got all these clothes on. Let me help you with this." Slowly he began to unbutton her blouse, his eyes locking with hers. Suddenly Michaela lowered her eyes and began nervously looking about. "Sully, what if someone sees us?" she spoke shyly.
"No one's gonna see us. You said yourself the kids were asleep. No one else is here. It's just me and you," Sully croaked, his pulse now racing.
"But if there's an emergency in town someone could come out here, or what if Katie wakes up?" she asked anxiously. Sully's hands continued to unbutton her blouse. "What...." Sully's lips quickly seized hers to quiet her. Slowly he pulled her blouse off her shoulders and then sliding it off of her arms, he hung it next to his. "That does feel better," she whispered sheepishly as Sully lifted her hand to his lips and lightly kissed it. "Here, it's your turn now," Sully whispered in her ear. "Let me massage you." Sully stood up as Michaela scooted down to the next step.
Sitting behind her, Sully reached down to touch Michaela's hair. "I love your hair hanging down. Can I take the pins out?" he asked softly. "It's so hot," she began to weakly protest. "Please," he softly begged, his voice low and husky. Michaela's heart once again melted at the sound of his voice, and slowly she nodded her head. With great care, Sully gently took out each hair pin, laying in next to him on the porch. Slowly her long silky hair tumbled down onto her back, and Sully gently ran his fingers through her tresses.
With one hand he gathered her hair and laid it over her left shoulder and leaning over he lightly kissed her neck, causing ‘her’ to shiver this time. Slowly he lowered the straps of her camisole and began to massage her neck and shoulders. After a few minutes, Sully leaned forward and whispered, "stay here, I'll be right back," and before Michaela could answer, Sully had jumped up and ran into the house. A few minutes later Sully came back out carrying a pillow and several blankets. He spread them out on one side of the porch and then walked over to the steps. Reaching down he took Michaela's hand and helped her up.
"Sully, here?" she pointed to the blankets, "on the front porch?" "Why not?" he grinned, as he pulled her close. "You said yourself how hot it is, and it’s even hotter upstairs." He ran his thumb across her full lips and kissed the corner of her mouth. Raising her eyebrow slightly, she looked at him with a wicked smile and whispered, "Yes, why not."
Silently they made their way over to the blankets and Sully slowly helped Michaela remove the rest of her clothes. After removing his buckskins they lowered themselves to the blankets and Sully pulled her into his arms, his lips finding and tasting hers. It wasn't long before their previous passion quickly resurfaced and their love was once again consummated in a glorious state of ecstasy.
Sully held Michaela close to him as their heartbeats gradually slowed. "Thank you," Michaela whispered, her hand lightly caressing Sully's chest. "That was..."
"Good?" Sully grinned as he kissed her still warm lips. "Oh, it was much more than good. It was wonderful..." Michaela sighed contently, "but it was something else too.."
"What?" Sully asked. "Well.., it was exciting," Michaela whispered, her cheeks flushing even more.
"Exciting, huh?" teased Sully, nibbling at her ear. "Maybe that's 'cause it was someplace new, maybe that's what made it excitin'."
Michaela looked up into Sully's eyes and slowly blinking her eyelids, she whispered softly, "Yes, I suppose that's true."
"You suppose, huh." Sully snickered. "Why do you think I like taken ya on all those different 'adventures', it keeps the romance excitin'. Don't want ya getting bored with me." Sully was now smiling broadly "Oh, you're never boring," Michaela returned his smile. "Definitely never boring."
Sully leaned over and kissed each one of Michaela’s eyes. "I love your eyes," Sully whispered, "They’re so beautiful, and..."
"And what?" Michaela smiled up at him.
"And... unique," Sully gazed deep into her eyes. "and that’s a good thing," he whispered close to her ear. "I love you, Michaela." He kissed her cheek.
Michaela shifted so she was laying spoon-fashion against Sully, and grabbing his arm she laid it over her waist. "I love you too," she whispered. "I love laying here with you afterwards, your arms wrapped around me. Even when it is 110 degrees outside." she smiled. Sully wiped the sweat from Michaela’s brow and leaning close to her ear, he teasingly whispered, "I love it when you’re all sweaty like me." Swatting at his hand, her eyes twinkling, she scolded lightly, "Sully!"
They laid there for a long time enjoying each other’s company and the comfort of being in each other’s arms. Breaking the silence, Michaela let out a deep sigh and looking out into the sky, she whispered, "It’s so beautiful out here, Sully. Everything’s so peaceful, so tranquil." Sully squeezed her arms tighter and kissed the top of her head. After another few moments of silence Michaela spoke wistfully, her voice barely audible, "It’s as if you can look up into the sky and forget about all your worries..." her voice trailed off as she stared out into the night.
Sully held Michaela close to him, relishing in the warmth and softness of her body next to his. He watched her now as she stared unseeingly into the night. He had noticed her sudden mood change but he was reluctant to bring up the subject of her mother. But watching her now, he knew that’s where her thoughts were. And though he didn’t want anything to spoil this night, he had told himself that he would try to talk to her again tonight.
"Michaela?" Sully spoke her name cautiously. "Hmmm," she answered in return, her hand unconsciously moving up and down his arm. .
Sully’s hand lightly caressed her stomach and leaning closer he said, "You know you can tell me anything don’t you. Nothin’ could ever change how I feel about you."
Michaela’s hand suddenly stilled and her body became tense. "Michaela, please, tell me what’s botherin’ ya," Sully gently pleaded.
Grabbing Sully’s hand she quickly removed it from her stomach and in a low voice she mumbled, "I’m tired, Sully. I’m going up to bed." Then in one swift movement Michaela quickly stood up and grabbing a blanket she wrapped it around her and hurried into the house, ignoring Sully’s plea as he urgently called after her.
Sully quietly opened their bedroom door and threw their clothes over the chair. After Michaela had left he had folded the blankets and retrieved all of their clothes off of the front porch. Now as he laid their clothes on the chair, he looked at his wife and wondered if she was asleep. He didn’t think so. He slowly climbed into bed and gently lifted the sheet. Cautiously he scooted closer and gently pulled her into his arms, her back against his chest. Lightly kissing the top of her head, he whispered, "I love you."
Without speaking, Michaela gave his arm a loving squeeze and snuggled in closer. Closing her eyes, she let out a sigh as a single tear slid down her cheek. "Goodnight, Michaela. Get some sleep," Sully whispered as he kissed the back of her head. Soon, he too closed his eyes, but sleep did not come easily for either one of them that night.
Michaela lay still in Sully’s arms, desperately trying to will herself to sleep. But whenever she closed her eyes, her thoughts turned to her mother’s last visit. She had thought that her mother had finally accepted her life out here in Colorado and her marriage to Sully. She had even thought that her mother had actually begun to like Sully. And she had come to believe that she and her mother had finally put their differences behind them after all these years. The last few times she was here there had been such a closeness between them that had been absent throughout her childhood.
She knew Sully was only trying to help, but why couldn’t he understand that she didn’t want to talk about it, that she couldn’t talk about it. Her mother had said so many horrible and hateful things about Sully. How could she tell her husband that her mother hated him so much that she came here to take her and the children away. How could she tell him that her mother still believed she belonged with David. And what did her mother mean when she said she was appalled by her behavior. What did David tell her about that night?
Silently she swiped at the tears that were falling onto her pillow. She thought she had buried that night long ago. She had lived with that shame and guilt for many years. It was only after she had fallen in love with Sully that she had been able to put that night to rest. And now, deep down she knew that that was the real reason she wasn’t able to talk about this. She had never found the courage to tell Sully about that night, and she still couldn’t find the courage now. "Why can’t everyone just leave it alone," she silently cried as her tears continued to wet her pillow.
Sully lay with Michaela spooned closely against him, his arm wrapped around her waist. He could feel her body tremble slightly and he knew that she was crying. It tore at his heart to see her like this but he knew that the best thing he could do for her now was just to hold her and to let her know that he was there.
As he lay there staring up at the ceiling he thought about what his reasons had been for not telling Michaela about his secret past, about him deserting the Army and also of his relationship with Sheryl. And he knew that if his past had not caught up with him, he probably never would have told Michaela about it. And now thinking back over the past few days and at Michaela’s reaction to each time he mentioned her mother, he realized that he was only causing her more pain.
Maybe it is something very personal between just her and her mother, Sully thought. Maybe I am reading too much into it. Maybe I need to just back off and accept the fact that this might be something that she needs to keep just to herself. If it’s something she wants me to know, then she’ll tell me when, and if, she’s ready.
His only concern was that whatever it was that was troubling her that she would be able to make peace with it herself. With that realization Sully yawned, and lightly kissing her shoulder, he finally fell asleep. Michaela’s tears soon subsided and exhaustion finally overtaking her, she too drifted off to sleep.
It had been two weeks since Sully returned from his surveying trip and much to his dismay, Michaela still had not told him anything about what went on with her mother. He had given up trying to get her to talk about it because she would only become angry and then walk off.
It was late one night when Sully came downstairs after putting Katie to bed that he found Michaela sitting in front of the fire, an unopened book in her lap. She was again deep in thought so when Sully knelt down beside her, startled, she jumped slightly, knocking the book to the floor. Sully reached down to pick up the book, and as he did so a letter fell out. He picked up the letter and seeing that it was addressed to her mother, he held it out to her and gently asked, "You gonna mail this?"
Seeing the letter in Sully’s hand, Michaela reached out and snapped it away, tucking it into the pocket of her robe. Avoiding Sully’s eyes she answered brusquely, "I don’t know yet."
Sully placed one hand on Michaela’s knee and then lifting her chin to look into his eyes, he said, "Michaela, you’ve been miserable ever since your ma left. You gotta talk to her, send her the letter."
Michaela flashed her angry eyes at Sully and retorted, "Sully, I can make my own decisions and I’d appreciate it if you let me make this one."
"I’m sorry," Sully apologized as he placed his hands on her shoulders, "I know ya can. I’m just saying you’ll feel better if you send the letter and patch things up with your mother."
Michaela looked at him in disbelief and then snapped, "You don’t know when to stop, do you?" before pushing his hands off of her shoulders.
Standing up, his hands on his hips, Sully looked at Michaela in bewilderment and trying to keep the anger out of his voice he said, "Alright, I’m sorry. I won’t mention it again."
"Thank you," Michaela replied curtly as she started to rise from her chair.
Placing his hand on her arm, Sully gently asked, "Where are you going?"
"I’m going to the privy. Do I need your permission for that also," she answered sarcastically.
His patience beginning to wear thin, Sully looked at Michaela and said, "What’s that supposed to mean? You know you don’t need my permission for anything." But as she continued to walk away Sully threw up his hands is exasperation and said, "I’m going up to bed. Goodnight Michaela," and turned and walked up the stairs.
"Michaela, wake up," Sully whispered softly as he gently shook her shoulders. Michaela slowly opened her eyes to see Sully standing over her. As her eyes slowly came into focus she realized that she was sitting downstairs in one of the wingback chairs. And then she remembered their fight and quickly she lowered her eyes.
"Michaela, it’s late, why don’t you come up to bed," Sully pleaded softly as he reached his hand out to help her stand.
Taking Sully’s hand Michaela stood up but before she knew what was happening Sully had lifted her off her feet and into his arms and started up the stairs. Michaela started to protest but Sully quieted her with a kiss. "Sshhh, you need to get some sleep," Sully spoke quietly, "and if ya stay in that chair much longer you’re gonna wake up with a stiff neck or a sore back."
Michaela lay her head on Sully’s shoulder as he carried her up the stairs and sat her on the bed. After helping her out of her robe Sully tucked her in under the covers and then slipping out of his buckskins, he climbed in beside her and quietly drew her into his arms. After they were both settled, Michaela looked up at Sully and meeting his eyes she whispered between yawns, "I’m sorry Sully, I’m sorry I yelled at you tonight."
Sully gazed into Michaela’s tired eyes and leaning down he gently kissed her lips. "That’s alright, I know you didn’t mean it?" Pulling back he smiled lovingly down at her and then whispered, "let’s try to get some sleep now. I love you."